Disillusioned Father Changes Daughter’s Name

LAKELAND - FL. Disillusioned by the accidents and necessary recalls of Toyota automobiles, Lakeland resident Pablo Eucharist filed a petition in the Circuit Court to legally change the name of his three-year-old daughter, Prius, to Molly. Eucharist and his wife, Georgiana, had taken advantage of an ongoing, but little-publicized program by Toyota North America which provided $3,000 to $5,000 in cashback to new car purchasers who gave newborn children the same name as the model car they purchased. “Financially, it made sense at the time, and the name Prius sounds quite nice,” Eucharist said, “but now there is a certain stigma that I don’t want my daughter to have when she grows up. I can just imagine all of the jokes by guys that ‘Prius just doesn’t stop’, and I won’t subject her to that.” Eucharist said that his other children, eleven-year-old daughter, Sequoia, and fourteen-year-old son, RAV4, like their names and told him that they don’t want them changed. Asked about the financial ramifications of changing her name to Molly, Eucharist said that his dealer is making an inquiry to Toyota to determine whether he must repay the $3,000 cashback he originally received.

Atrazine Linked to Gay Lifestyle

The National Academy of Sciences recently reported that Atrazine, a common pesticide, chemically castrates male frogs and in some instances changes them into completely functional females. The scientists who conducted the tests reported that 90 percent of the exposed male frogs were demasculinized, suffering from decreased testosterone, low fertility, and an inability to outcompete non-exposed males inbreeding. http://news.mongabay.com/2010/0301-hance_atrazine.html Interestingly, the other 10 percent of the exposed male frogs showed markedly increased heterosexual activity, frequently cheating on their mates. [Most frogs mate for life, frequently choosing a mate while both are polliwogs.]

Gay Frogs

Scientists at the University of Phoenix reported a parallel result in humans. Atrazine is universally used as the pesticide of choice at most golf courses, and as a result, golfers, especially professional golfers, are frequently exposed to large doses of the chemical. Observing the players at several of both public and private courses in the Phoenix, Arizona, area over a period of several years, the scientists found that many of the players exhibited increasingly effeminate traits, including dressing in clothing of colors usually worn by female players. Many have been seen openly hugging on the courses. A congressional hearing may be in the works. Congressman Barney Frank (DEM-Mass.) held a press conference at his Washington office today. Citing both the National Academy of Science and the University of Phoenix reports, Frank said that he would ask Speaker Pelosi to appoint a committee to study the problem, noting that many lawmakers and most lobbyists are golfers. “Although I personally never venture out on a golf course and the chemical would have no effect on me, I am concerned about the frogs, although most of the frogs I know are in Quebec.” Frank also mentioned that Senator Larry Craig had voiced concern about the issue before his retirement from the Senate. Frank also allowed that Tiger Woods “maybe a ten percenter.”